Channel 4 News League Recap, Week 14.

The playoff field is set. I am yet another victim of the the running back whims of Mike Shanahan, whose decisions left me with three Broncos backs on my roster and the wrong one starting last weekend. How did I not see this coming?

*1. I Roll w Chris Henry 10-4-0 .714 1696.52
*2. Pennsyltucky Power! 10-4-0 .714 1513.24
*3. Jazz Fluties 8-6-0 .571 1445.20
*4. Haywood Jablome 8-6-0 .571 1362.46
*5. I Love Lamp 8-6-0 .571 1318.84
*6. Brady’s F*ck Trophy 7-7-0 .500 1625.64
7. The Rainmakers 7-7-0 .500 1624.08
8. Das Smoot 7-7-0 .500 1486.24
9. SupremeSilverSharpie 6-8-0 .429 1525.90
10. Bad Newz Kennels 6-8-0 .429 1386.78
11. Benoit’s Day Care 4-10-0 .286 1388.52
12. Smoot’s Fingercuffs 3-11-0 .214 1287.54

The Rainmakers 138.44, Jazz Fluties 86.84 – I beat up on Extra P., who was missing a running back (Derrick Ward) and already assured of a playoff spot — Peyton Manning blowing out the Ravens and Marques Colston scoring twice helped. However, I missed a playoff spot by 1.56 fucking points, and I blame Mike Shanahan for this — despite the fact that Travis Henry was back and healthy, Selvin Young started and rushed for 156 yards — which would have put me well in front of OMDQ had there been any fucking inkling that this would happen.

I Roll W/ Chris Henry 120.72, Supreme Silver Sharpie 103.20 –  Larry needed every one of Tom Brady’s 40 points, as everyone else as several of his starters underachieved and TSW had Randy Moss and a few others playing well. However, he is still the #1 seed in the playoffs with this victory.

Pennsyltucky Power! 152.88, Brady’s Fuck Trophy 83.44 – RUTS had only two starters not get into double figures, which is usually a good barometer for a win. The Fuck Trophy, despite losing, backs into a playoff spot with enough points from Brett Favre and Roddy White to hold off the Rainmakers.

(Fuck you again, Shanahan.)

Haywood Jablome 82.28, I Love Lamp 65.38 – Ted is living off Tony Romo and Jamal Lewis, which is enough to beat AA’s crap team.  Haywood clinches a playoff spot, and AA is so losing next Sunday.

Bad Newz Kennels 80.90, Benoit’s Day Care 76.54 – Marco won via the Jacksonville defense and Texas WR Andre Johnson, while the Flyers should be lucky that they picked up Derek Anderson to look respectable.

Das Smoot 128.12, Smoot’s Fingercuffs 109.36 – The Fingercuffs got their best performance out of Matt Hasselbeck and still couldn’t hang with Das Smoot’s tandem of Brees, LT, and Packers RB Ryan Grant.

This Week: Chris Henry’s Entourage and Pennsyltucky’s finest have byes this week.  The wild-card matchups consist of a rematch between Haywood and the Lamp (we’re putting money on Haywood unless God stops forsaking Jon Kitna) and the Jazz Fluties will take on the Fuck Trophy.

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One Response

  1. Dammit. I really wanted to rain on Larry’s parade.

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