There’s An NCAA Rule For Everything.

Despite my Southern Cal homerdom, I have a soft spot for anything and everything CU — I have friends from high school who went there (some even played football in Boulder). I remember Kordell Stewart’s Hail Mary in the end zone fondly. I deplore anything and everything Cornhusker, so much so that seeing that particular shade of Nebraska red is like showing it to a bull — automatic rage (it especially helps that a former Raider coach is now leading those fools after Saint Osborne took the next step for a professional huckster: getting himself elected to Congress.) I seethe at the mere mention of Gary Barnett’s name, and hope that Dan Hawkins will at least get us a Big XII North title one of these days. Asking for a conference win right now with Texas and Oklahoma in the South is a bit much. Baby steps.

Ten years in the Denver/Boulder area will do that to you.

So, anything that says that the hard-luck Buffs are on probation does not sit well with me, particularly considering just how stupid this particular offense is: it basically amounts to a $2 discrepancy to charging walk-on athletes for food — it’s the difference between training-table meals and regular meals, adding up to $61,700 from 2000-2005. Still, this, according to our current associate AD (and former women’s hoops coach), is something that just bugged her so much she couldn’t let it go:

If that sounds harsh or even ridiculous, it doesn’t to CU associate athletic director Ceal Barry, whose conscience prevented her from not reporting to the NCAA the 133 violations from 2000-05 that earned the school sanctions Thursday.

“You want to be committed to doing the right thing all the time,” Barry said at a news conference.

Other potential rules I suspect the NCAA either already has on the books or might propose:

1. Detailed regulations on where athletes can take a shit.
2. Clarification of methods of payment for books and supplies from the campus bookstore.
3. How many drinks can be picked up on the tab by an athlete or for one.

These rules, like others, are possibly devised in the back rooms of AD meetings or NCAA admin conferences, so it looks like they are actually doing something in between the games of golf.

Well, it’s not like the football team will miss the three scholarships from the 86 of the apparently 133 violations — Hawkins & Co. have enough trouble trying to fill ’em with blue-chippers anyway Besides, this is Big XII football! Those boys need to eat! This nobility stuff, I don’t think we’re cut out for it. “Noblility” and “doing the right thing” is for teams that don’t have problems winning football games, and when you’re looking to improve from a season with an 0-4 start, doing right is for chumps and bottom-feeders.